Saturday, 18 September 2010

10 Most Popular Yankee Whoppers

As people get old and senility takes hold, they get solace from the lies they're told. Is Uncle Sam now lapsing into second childhood? Consider the growing list of fictions for grandfather:

1) "Recovery is coming." Great news, Dad! (Yeah, in 25 years!)
2) "Our wars are being won." (Of course they are - by the enemy!)
3) "The border is secure." (The Mexicans don't let anyone sneak in!)
4) "American industry is still tops." (Just ask the Chinese who staff the off-shore factories!)
5 "The Russians started the Georgian invasion." ('Cause the CIA and IDF said so!)
6) "Israel is our staunchest ally." (Who wouldn't be, with 4-5 billion in annual shell-outs?)
7) "The Jews don't control Hollywood." (Just ask the top 8 producers: Cohen, Coen, Coon, Kahn, Kagan, Conn, Coffen and Katz!)
8) "The Romans, not the Jews, killed Jesus." (Look it up in the Talmud!)
9) "Diversity is strength." (Aren't our Muslims stronger than ever?)
10) "God loves America." (He always afflicts his favorites. Just ask the Jews!)

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