Sunday, 19 June 2011

Calling All Cars!





APB: Jim Chu Caught with his Pants Down: Wanted for Questioning

Description: short, politically correct and deceitful; aka the smiling Buddha of ineptitude; charge: naked incompetence, dereliction, impersonating a police officer; last seen passing the buck at a press conference.

Also Wanted: the following Accomplices:
Gregor Robertson; description: tall, politically correct and deceitful; charge: impersonating a mayor; last seen trying to cover his ass in Stanley Park.
NHL: description: fat, politically correct and deceitful; charge: misrepresentation, inciting a riot and biting.
The Vancouver media: description: anorexic, politically correct and deceitful; reportedly amnesiac - evidently unable to recall any event prior to the year 1995; charge: misleading the public, operating a brothel without a license and a criminal disregard for fact. (NB: Potentially suicidal)
Canada: description: obese, hockey-crazed and delusional; charge: collective intoxication, corrupting a minor, and impersonating a nation. Approach with extreme caution: suspect possibly rabid.