Saturday, 16 June 2012

Mitt's Mistress Distress

As Obama sucks
Up to the influx,
And Romney ducks,
America self-destructs.

Ay, Mitt, como se dice "deer in the headlights" en espanol? 

Romney speaks better Spanish, but when it comes to illegals it's Obama who talks their language, a language with as many code terms for amnesty as Eskimos have words for snow. Witless Mitt wasn't saying anything, however, after Obama sucker punched him with an announced amnesty - code word: stay of deportation -  for under-thirty illegals. When he finally opened up it was in his accustomed elocutionary style, both sides of the mouth. Standard press-speak tells us he's trying to balance the baloney immigration pledges he made during the primaries with his lust for the fresh meat of the hispanic vote. And failing miserably. Like a man panting after a hot senorita but with a drab and nagging wife hanging onto his arm, Mitt feels caught between a rock and a hard-on. It's a war between his better half and half the electorate. Too bad he's not living in a Latino country himself, since the Southern culture is more tolerant of such connubial lapses than are the Republican biddies now holding Mitt's big flat feet to the fire. But, patience, Mitt, it's coming!    
       And when it does come the Republicans can take a big bow for helping it get here. Right before they bow out of America's national arena forever, that is, made otiose and redundant by their own stupendous paralysis on this suicidal issue. Was not George W. Bush amnesty's patron saint? He routed the Taliban as the right cheered, but when he left his country's own southern flank exposed to an invasion they said nothing. Even the sainted Reagan did almost nothing to stop the endless train of migration, which just started gaining steam under his rule. Reagan's supporters hated high taxes but they also hated high wages. They still do, of course, and that's why America is drowning in a continuous flood of human wage controls spilling over the Rio Grande's banks.
       Romney, too, loathes high wages, a bane to all capitalists, and pardon the pun but never pardon the hypocrisy it points to. In his hypocritical heart Romney has always been pro-amnesty, pro-growth and progressive. In other words, a liberal pure and simple. Alas, no one is pure when it comes to the temptations of power, and as the poor bastard is reluctantly led away by the spouse of his youthful vows toward the safe and stuffy domicile of white America, he knows he's got only one mad chance to bring it all together, wife, mistress, honor and victory: a Mormon foursome!

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