Monday, 30 December 2013

Person of the Year: Ol' Man Winter

                                                    Blowing all the fools away.

That Ol' Man Winter, he must know something,
He just keeps dumping,
Mountains of snow and sleet
All over their carbon feet.

There's snowfall on the Sphinx,
Great Lakes look like rinks,
It's snowing' down Mexico way, 
It's snowing in the middle of May!  

"Science" tried to banish him,
They said his caps were vanishin'
But ask the bears and penguins:
They're back with a vengeance.

That Ol' Man Winter, he's some kind of wizard,
He makes the storm and blizzard,
While glaciers keep on forming,
And all the time it's "warming!" 

 He don't be afakin',
He don't make no prediction,
And them folk what make 'em,
They're soon science fiction.

But that Ol' Man Winter
He just keep a blowin' 
He just keep a blowin' 
Them off!

Saturday, 21 December 2013

The Case of the Accidental Orgasm

To Canada's liberal media, Beverly McLachlin may be a legal giant with her head grazing the rhetorical clouds, but as a logician she'd be right at home in Gulliver's Lilliput, tying down the great questions of the day with the specious threads of pygmy bias and petty politics. Like more than a few of the bewigged franchise, she's given to offering rather bizarre case analogies which neither the prosecution nor the press seem inclined or able to discomfit.  
      Her brief against the current law prohibiting brothels, for example, was shored up by a spurious comparison likening prostitution to riding a bicycle. Once the state decriminalizes the business of selling sex, she opines, it can no more deny a prostitute the right to "protect herself" by whoring out of her own home than it could justly deny us the right to wear a helmut while riding a bike. Case closed! ejaculated her adoring press. 
   Objection, your Honor! Is this an accurate or even a sensible parallel? True, both activities involve riding, but there the congruity ends. Riding a bike entails the risk of falling off regardless of where one rides, but with the risk obviously rising in traffic. A helmut, however, does not prevent accidents but only protects one from excessive injury in an accident. But the sex trade, goes the argument, becomes a relatively safe occupation if conducted at home or in a controlled office setting. So working at home is the "helmut" that actually prevents accidents??? No such helmut exists. So by Mclachlin's gimmicky simile the defining act of prostitution wouldn't be the bicycle ride but the accident itself. Come, come!
     A more just and apposite trope would be of a law that forbade cycling on the sidewalk. The cyclist claims that riding in the street puts her at excessive risk, but the state counters that she is putting others at risk by riding on something that was designed strictly for walking. Anyone not aware of the risk implied here is invited to ponder the prospect of seeing one's next door neighbor install a red light above her door. Case closed. Door closed.
    Of course, our risqué cyclist has the option of not riding at all, to peddle no more and join the rest of us in our pedestrian but relatively safe existence on the path of honest labor. And, as the government argued, albeit none too successfully, this is an option that society has always left open to our unfortunate women of the streets.

Tuesday, 17 December 2013

Family Matters

Before you eat James Moore for breakfast, consider: Was he not justified in assailing the ever-expanding dependency ethic in this country that starts with comparatively ample state provision of sustenance, aka welfare, for families - mostly single mothers with young children - and ends up with children, some of whom are not even in assisted families, getting breakfast AND lunch prepared for them gratis at school by strangers? What's next - government supper wagons tootling up the driveway every night? Quite honestly, what is a parent's role as parent in all of this? Being out of work is one thing, but allowing yourself to be pushed out of the picture entirely is quite another. In the most charitable light, James Moore can be seen to be actually supportive of the poor insofar as he does not want the state usurping the parent's traditionally bonding role in the personal feeding of her own children. Or is that in fact what the statists find so offensive?

There's a piece in the Asian press about the widening gulf in Vancouver between Chinese immigrants and the locals. Local Chinese, that is. Seems that the old stock of immigrants, ie, those who arrived all of ten years or so ago, resent the new breed of investor immigrants from the mainland who buy their way in and then price the homeys right out of the market. Being myself a white guy who's been long since priced right out of even renting in Vancouver, I'll refrain from interjecting into this family dispute. Suffice it to say that the ultimate cause of this immigration, which has gone unabated for forty years, is our own pathetic birth rate; at least the Asians still value children almost as much as they do real estate. And in Hong Kong it looks as though the former has long since overtaken the latter. Hongcouver, here we come!

Friday, 1 November 2013

Double Talk from a Half-Ass

Old horse face was shovelling it to the Euros recently.  The BBC, at least, seems to be buying it.

"US Secretary of State John Kerry has said that in some cases, US spying has gone too far. But does Kerry actually say this? No. "Spying" is never mentioned, only "information gathering." 
Mr Kerry is the most senior Obama administration official to have commented directly on an issue that has upset America's European allies.
He said he will work with the president to prevent further inappropriate acts by the National Security Agency. But does he promise that such acts will end? Of course not!   
But Mr Kerry also defended the need for increased surveillance, saying it had thwarted terrorist attacks.
"We have actually ("actually:" usually a sure giveaway that a pol is lying) prevented airplanes from going down, buildings from being blown up, and people from being assassinated (What? People being assassinated? How awful, and so un-American!) because we've been able to learn ahead of time of the plans," Mr Kerry told a conference in London via video link. (Strange, no reports of any arrests have surfaced these last few years. Lots of assassinations, though!)
"I assure you, (!!!) innocent people are not being abused in this process, but there's an effort to try to gather information. What's with the "but"? Buried somewhere in the non sequitur seems to be a concession that the effort to gather information entails the very abuse he's denying. And yes, in some cases, it has reached too far inappropriately. Could it have "reached too far" appropriately? Seems it did just that until Snowden reached for the download button.
"And the president, our president, (yes, John, Europe is not quite a part of the USA - yet!) is determined to try ("determined to try?" Meaning he's not very determined at all. We determine to do it or we will try to do it, but we don't determine to try to do it unless we ain't going to do it.) to clarify and make clear for people, (is that two tasks or just one, John?) and ("and?" - what was it that the president your president was going to clarify? We're not told. Clarifying has now become an intransitive, not to say transcendental, activity, it seems.) and is now doing a thorough review in order that nobody will have the sense of abuse," he said . . . " Nobody having "the sense of abuse" hardly ensures that nobody is being abused. Nobody had any "sense of abuse" until that nobody Snowden put us all on the scent.

Monday, 7 October 2013

Hope and Name Change

Though "native leaders" may be given to squawk,
Polls indicate Joe Redskin doesn't give a _ _ _ _;
And as for Chief Mighty Lame Duck,
Let us now Barry the tomahawk!

Monday, 16 September 2013

Paging Mad Mel

Was he drunk, they asked, or plain delirious?
His logic, of course, was totally spurious;
And let AIPAC look never so imperious - 
"Jews to blame for all the wars?" He can't be Syria's
Now, whether hiding out in his Malibu home,
Or safely down under where the wallaby roam,
For the first time since Tinsel's exiling,
Wherever he is, Mel must be smiling.

Sunday, 14 July 2013

Free at last, Free at last, thank God almighty he is Free at last!

"We're not animals." A black woman explaining the lack of rioting at the Zimmerman verdict. OK. But what separates humans from animals? Reason and reason only. 

"This is a failure of justice, I don't think there's any other way to view it." This  from one Eliot Spitzer, quondam New York attorney general, governor, and whoremonger. He's trying for a comeback it seems, and what better way to reform than to turn whore yourself. 

"... high immigration is taking place at a time of unprecedentedly low ethnic hostility..." David Brooks, at NYT 2 weeks ago! Who's high now, David?

"There will always be injustices like the murder of Trayvon Martin, but in our multiracial future, led by our color-blind children, there will be fewer of them." Joe Klein in Time - No comments allowed on this one, hey Joe? Maybe color-blind Klein should have a squint at the comments on other sites before he declares the end of "biracial' America. Colorful doesn't begin to describe the general tone. As for the Cinderella story adawning in the schools and daycares, well that's exactly what the scribes and pharisees have been deceitfully proclaiming for fifty years. ("We'll get your kids." Alen Ginsberg) Scribe, you got nuttin!
  At times like this many in the USA are wont to look back at the happier, simpler days of the fifties when Sgt Joe Friday could sum up the entire justice system in one cogent line: Just the facts, ma'am.      

"USA's collapsing like a house of cards." Comment @ CNN - And every one of them is a race card.     

If being dumb was a crime in need of retribution,
GZ (and half the planet) would face summary execution.

Friday, 28 June 2013


In Mexico you're guilty until proven innocent. At the NYT you're left until proven right . . . 

"Let’s make some educated guesses about what the New America will look like." Why guess? Just look at Mexico and anyone can see what tomorrow holds for the Land of the Freeloader: plenty of crime, grime and get off the dime. California is already de facto Reconquista territory, with the rest of the sand states sure to follow. As for the "economically dynamic" country that Brooks (another one of those self-described conservatives who's anything but) is dreamily conjuring up, first let him explain how the current economic hollowing-out of America, coinciding almost perfectly with the ballooning out of immigration rates, won't exacerbate itself in a future flooded by millions more immigrants, legal and otherwise, eager to do the work that Americans (yeah yeah, here it comes) "can't or won't do." 
          Americans are becoming a terribly lazy people: too lazy to do labour, too lazy to raise kids, and too lazy to even get up off the sofa and vote for someone who might stop the insanity before it's finally too late. They need more exercise, no question, and putting Brooks and his Judeo-Corporate cant out with the garbage is a good place to start.

Monday, 24 June 2013

All the News for a Laughing Fit

"Snowden, US engaged in intercontinental game of cat-and-mouse" Cat and mouse? Right! As in "Tom and Jerry!" Flat-footed Uncle Sam is no match for the fleet-footed techie, it seems. And all those "friendly" nations laughing up their sleeves as they secretly abet the artful dodger under the solemn pretext of "legal procedures" just adds to the worldwide hilarity.
Grrrls! Are we going to take this sitting down? He's already been ordained a full-fledged "she" by the journos: ". . . to let her use the girl’s bathroom . . ." (my emphasis) they advise. Ah yes, the old question-begging pronoun maneuver, routinely employed by liberal journos in order to co-opt the reader into accepting as a given what in fact is in dispute. Aka brainwashing lite. All part of an updated, Westernized version of the Soviet-era game of Samizdat, where the subversively minded consumer must mentally decode the quasi-official equivocations and then reassemble them with the requisite scare quotes now in place. 

Update: Snowden is still cooling his heels in Moscow. Why? Let's hope he's not going rockstar like that idiot Asange. Move your ass, techie, or it's going to get kicked!

Obama's Climate Plans Face Yearslong Fight  But first, how about a plan for Sunday's tee-off forecast? 

The New F-Word: Father! Wrong! The new F word is none other than feminism itself. Most under-thirty women dread any contact with the movement. They've seen what it can do to a human brain: total dissociation from reality. Witness the toll it's taken on one Kathleen Parker, self-described conservative and author of the absurd title Save the Males. Women are gaining supremacy everywhere, she claims in the link article. Except, as she fails to note, where it really counts: not in the college wymins studies seminar but in the nation's boardrooms. Wasn't it just last month that American women were being exhorted to "lean in" more? (Don't lean in too far, ladies, or the PowerPoint may get lost in the embonpoint.) And just last week Obama was going through the annual hand wringing ritual over those stubborn "gender injustices" that just won't go away. Parker, who works out of a number of mainstream sites and talk shows, evidently believes that men are moping around desperate for a little tea and sympathy from their distaff displacers. No doubt her male colleagues in the mainstream circus, who typically - and scandalously - outnumber, out-rank and out-lean the females, are crying - all the way to the bank!    

Fact is, the only people down on men and fathers are the journos themselves and their Hollywood relatives. It's a closed loop, of course, one side feeding the other's fantasies. And the only reason they're getting away with it is the fact that men are still on top. And so they're expected to suck it up with a smile. And who wouldn't smile at such a silly title as Save the Males? Thar she blows, Kathleen.
In business and hitech, in high pay trades and big industry, it remains what James Brown said it was, a man's world. So, do the numbers, ladies, but be forewarned, because as Barbie (long since censored) once said, "Math is tough!" 

Sunday, 16 June 2013

Don't Retread On Me!

"Balancing our need for security with our ... "  No need to even finish the tedious drivel. Such is the tsunami of inanity spewing from mainstream this past week that if you haven't heard or read this pious pap at least a dozen times then you must be on high ground indeed. Down here in "reality" we're drowning in it. Even the usually tough minded - or at least right minded - Pat Buchanan has joined the chorus. And speak of the devil. Wasn't pitiful Pat ignominiously fired just last year for lamenting the impending death of white America? Lo and behold, what was the really big story this week? You guessed it, brother. "White Deaths Outnumber Births for first Time in History" groaned the media. They weren't groaning for the death of their race, of course, but rather for the onerous obligation of having to report it. (So right wing, you know.) One of them called our yawning collective grave a "grave concern." Maybe that's why the NYT buried it asap. A "surprising slump" advised the WaPo. Surprising? Not to Buchananites. I'd call PJB a prophet in his own land but for the fact that that's just it - it ain't his land anymore! Or WaPo's. (Some say that it ain't their race, either, but that's beside the point since we're all going to be strangers in a strange land pretty soon.)
     America's famed melting pot has become a seething cauldron of ethnic resentment and distrust. And most immigrants hail from places where government intrusion is an accepted way of life. In fact, people feel left out over there if the state's not watching their every move. So this latest demographic catastrophe makes for a nice fit with Obama's latest Big Brother brand. Blanket security is the new American majority's security blanket.
    Surveillance, they say, is the "unavoidable cost of security." Wrong! It's the inevitable price the US is paying for its dogmatic refusal to target the one demographic accountable for 99% of the world's terrorism. Because residents from Muslim countries can't be singled out for surveillance, everybody has to be. Profiling of some, no. Covert files on all, yes! Each new atrocity ratchets up another notch on the electronic manacles. The circulation is starting to slow. Before you know it, gangrene is setting in.
     Islam isn't going away anytime soon. In fact it's thriving. But hardly a decade after 9-11 the US constitution is on life support. In another ten years it'll be in a coma. The legendary "Don't Tread On me" Dixie rattler, emblem of rebels and a Tea Party icon, is starting to look like Ouroboros, the mythical worm that ate its own tail. So the suppression of freedom always gets justified as a preservation of freedom.
     (The grandiose Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms, in contrast, was dead on arrival, a limp appendage, a political dildo. Up here, freedom has always been a myth.)
      And is that the Fourth of July just around the corner? Well, strike up the band, pour the tea and start the parade! But first, let's sew some updated retreads on some of those bald testaments of freedom land, so sorely tested of late.
Thomas Jefferson: We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are spied upon equally; that they are endowed by their creator with certain rights of aliens; that among these are welfare, healthcare and the pursuit of a driver's license.
Patrick Henry: I say, give me liberty or give me Xanax!  
Honest Abe Lincoln: . . . that they should have government by the peephole, for the peephole and of the peephole.

Friday, 31 May 2013

What's more contemptible: Islam or Britain? Islam began in a cave, Britain is heading for the caves. Islam bows to the Prophet, Britain bows to the profit (from immigration). Islam hates the infidel, Britain hates the individual. Islam lies to the world, Britain lies to itself. Islam is out for blood, Britain is bloodless. Islam is terror, Britain is terrified. Islam abhors the dog, Britain is going to the dogs. Islam commits mass murder, Britain commits mass suicide. Islam is hell, Britain is going to hell. Islam never laughs, Britain's a joke.

Sunday, 26 May 2013

re:coil (for logoholics only)

Was Shakespeare's famous reference to our "mortal coil" strictly of the first meaning, or was Hamlet indulging in another example of Bardic ambiguity? The inference of date and (unknown) origin seems to militate against such a twofold reading. In other words, the "trouble and confusion" sense of the word ascribed to the passage in the play predates its now more familiar meaning of "spiral looping" by fifty years or so. But the play itself was written only a decade or so before the first recorded use of the physical term. Mightn't Hamlet, then, anachronistically aware of the convoluted connotations creeping into the term around the time of the play's composition, be in fact entwining the two meanings, psychical and physical, evoking, as it were, mortality's mythical roots, when a serpent first coiled around the forbidden tree to all of mankind's SINuous undoing?  (posted at Merriam Webster

Saturday, 11 May 2013

Mother's Days

Afraid of getting left out in the cold,
She froze her eggs and put baby on hold,
Made a lotta dough while her milk dried up,
Then handed Prince Charming a plastic cup;
She had her little Miracle just shy of menopause,
Delivered on schedule to general applause,
(Caesarian birth just to be safe);
Spared no expense on her test tube waif,
Nursery, daycare, and school, she vowed,
All the best and beyond, cum laude;
But all through youth her precious good-as-gold,
Puzzled herself with what couldn't be told:
Why Mommy looks so preternaturally old.

Saturday, 2 March 2013

Green Card Blues

Canadians were in an especially exultant mood this past week, having constricted yet again the boundaries of acceptable speech across their envied dominion. First they got it form the horse's arse, aka the Supreme Fart in the Face of Justice, that state ganging on "haters" is completely justifiable and 100% Charter friendly as long as it is justifiable. No, that is not a halo above Chief Justice McLachlin's sheep-skinned crown; it's the circular logic of a second rate brain trying to push the square peg of compulsion into round hole of conscience. Screw you, Beverly!  
Next, the entire country indulged in one of those periodic episodes of shock and outrage, so good for the collective soul of dullards, after an academic had the temerity to suggest that kiddie porn readers, being victimless criminals, didn't belong in jail with murderers and thieves. The prof subsequently lost his media affiliations, university appointment and countless scandalized "friends." Novel and provocative points of view were once the protected province of any academic worth his salt, but Mr. Flanagan has learned too late a bitter Canadian reality: publish and perish. My advice to Tom: go south young man! Let these Canuck clunkers get a taste of their own censure when it's become a commonplace among universities that in politically correct Canada the motto is, Thinking Strictly Prohibited. 
Oh, for a green card my eternal soul I'd sell,
Cause I'm already living in True North hell.

But wait a minute!  The Yanks have put some poor fool in jail for possessing contraband manga, for reading fiction godsakes! What's next on the agenda, tapping into our brains for contraband dreams? 

Saturday, 23 February 2013

Coming soon: The Esteem of the Damned

Saturday, 2 February 2013

Look Who's a Surrender Monkey Now!

AS the Yanks come crawling home from Iraq, leaving the country in near chaos, with al Qaida, the heir apparent of all chaos, licking its chops in the wings, the French are relishing the role of heroic saviors in Mali after routing the brutal Islamists. A comparison of the two interventions is instructive.
The French intervened in Mali in response to direct appeals from a former colony.
The Americans invaded Iraq out of the vengeful whim of one man, George W Bush.
The French acted on credible evidence of terrorism and cruelty.
The Americans based their justification for war on sheer lies.
Humanity motivated the French.
Vindictiveness drove Washington.
As the extremists were driven out of Mali, a limited, sane Islam resumed its place in the society.
In the wake of the US invasion, al Qaida infiltrated Iraq and only added to the sectarian strife which Saddam's removal had incited throughout the land.
Mali's retreating Islamists burned libraries.
America's invading army looted museums.
The French won the hearts and mind campaign before it even started.
The Americans won nothing but fear and loathing from day one.
By staying out of Iraq, the French kept the national morale and treasure intact, ready to serve a just cause when it came.
By wading into Iraq's quagmire, the Yankees exhausted themselves and became bystanders when the real fight began.
Granted, the French still eat cheese, but the Americans have been eating Islamic crow for a decade.

Wednesday, 30 January 2013

Link and Think

So, it seems there are certain things, "sacred cows," that one mustn't speak of in Canada. Margaret Wente, the chronicler of all that's cute and topical, finds it amusing that we're afraid to suggest that Maggie Atwood is a second rate writer, or that National Day Care is socialism for the middle class. Reader's Digest can play this for laughs if they like, but last November the RCMP arrested a man for questioning Holocaust propaganda on his blog, to the general indifference, be it noted, of Ms. Wente and her tittering colleagues. Sacred cows aside, Canada's guarantee of free speech is nothing but a lot of bull.

Say what you will about Hitler - at least as long as it's disapproving!*- and his renewed popularity in modern Germany, the grotesque paradox remains: had the Nazis prevailed in WWll, the attraction of Hitler would not be what it is today because the insane policy of multicult and mass Muslim immigration would never have been implemented. Indeed, the whole point of Europe's disastrous exercise in collective suicide appears to be the need to prove to themselves that they aren't stupid nazis - just stupid.

Lebensraum, Yankee Style
The Telegraph notes, "More than 400 women and children were shot or burned alive [at the French village of Oradour-sur-Glane] in the [Nazi] attack." Contrast this with another incident a mere fifty-four years prior:  ". . . there were 350 Native Americans [massacred at wounded Knee], of whom all but 120 were women and children." Yes, there are differences between the two atrocities. For one thing, the US has yet to repudiate the many Medals of Honor awarded to the "brave" and bloody perpetrators of Wounded Knee. (BTW, did you know that following Wounded Knee, Frank L Baum, author of the beloved children's classic The Wizard of Oz, called for the total annihilation of all Indians in the USA? Follow the yellow brick road - to genocide!) 

*Attitudes and tastes you might share with the Fuhrer: loved dogs and children; great fan of Shirley Temple, Clark Gable and (Jewish!) Charlie Chaplin; loved art and aspired at one time to be a painter; favorite composers:Wagner and Beethoven; hated socialism and gave business a free hand, built the Autobahn, and promoted the Volkswagon; and last but not least, retained an undying disdain for journalists of all stripes and persuasions. Now, don't you feel guilty?

Sunday, 20 January 2013

Bottoms Up!

O, won't we have a merry time, drinking whiskey, beer and wine, on coronation, coronation day! - English folk song(?) (from Ulysses)

It's party time in Obama Land but don't blame the media's lightheadedness on the bourbon. The prospect of four more years of getting paid for not doing their jobs would make anyone tipsy with delight. So drink up, journo, and don't worry about the hangover. No one's expecting anything serious from you tomorrow... or the next day. . . or the next. . . Just go to sleep in the fumes of mindless adulation and stay asleep for the next four years while your country goes to hell in a handbasket: debt, war, terrorism, immigration chaos and general dysfunction all await your eventual professional attention. But for now, drink to His Highness' health and piss on professionalism. Just don't get behind the wheel, fellas. Those fiscal cliffs can be tricky after a few tall ones. Looking for a little fun? Try the Spanish quarter, they'll show you a good time. Stay out of Rightsville, though. Those boys will roll you as soon as look at you. And the women are all whores! Need a cab? Just call al-Qaeda taxi co. They never sleep. One more for the road not taken? Make it a double. Cheers, gents!

Saturday, 19 January 2013

Crusade Time

Mali is a country with a functioning true democracy and as such it deserves the full and immediate aid of the Western powers against the threat of Muslim criminality. A true democracy is one which presupposes the inviolable integrity of the individual citizen, unlike the sham democracies which have sprung up in the MidEast, such as in Libya, Egypt, and (soon to be) Syria, where democratic mechanisms enable Islamic tyrannies to destroy individual rights. The Western media loved the Arab Spring, but when it reverted predictably into a Muslim ice age no one admitted the obvious difficulty with "democracy," that it means nothing without the informing habit of mutual respect, respect not for different points of view but for the right of people to hold such views. This distinction is lost on Muslims bent on converting, or rather coercing, the world into accepting the shackles of Sharia "law." Islam is a game that brooks no outsiders, either everyone plays or no one does. The rebellion in Egypt was doomed to failure the moment that the newly "liberated" hordes started salaating in the streets. Equality wasn't designed for people on their bellies. And democracy without equality, the right to be equal regardless of what one believes, is meaningless. Cut off from this underlying core of humanity, it's a Frankenstein monster, cobbled together from the parts of corpses stolen from foreign cultures. And like Frankenstein, it must turn on its creator until it's destroyed in turn by the latest thug from the military. The cycle is as plain as a summer day: dictator - democracy - Islam - chaos - dictator. The only way to get rid of the dictator is to first get rid of his enabler, the mullah. Muslims are like the cicadas of Araby which burrow up from the earth every twenty or so years to make a great buzz about freedom until the tyrant's boot pushes them back into the dirt for another long season of political torpor.  
       So let the West throw off its own torpor before the odious plague of islam infests the ground of true freedom in Mali. Wake up, Canada and USA, and take up the cross of conscience. The monster of the Maghreb now stalks us all.