Sunday, 27 March 2016

Brussels' Sprouts - Illiberal Limericks 10

News item: Belgium world's number one exporter of home-grown jihadis.

Now, of all European cultivars,
The one caution most prudently bars,
Is a rank little cabbage
From a region most savage,
More lethal than microbes from Mars.

Though it once was a plant quite benign,
Til it was grafted to imports malign,
Its least little taste
Whole countries can waste
By destroying the national spine.

For, once having ingested the spore,
The victims start craving for more,
Their strange paralysis
Defies all analysis:
Lying five times a day on the floor!

Susceptibility varies by zone,
With the French being especially prone,
With Hollande the chief chef
They couldn't get enough,
Til their appetite softened their bone.

For Merkel the buds were hot-button,
When served up with Levantine mutton;
Being nothing loth
To consume the fell growth,
She was Europe's worst punishment glutton!

Here, too, our own governing class,
Is eager to import them en masse; 
For our multicult cuisine,
Now favouring the green,
Is more dopey than legalized grass!

But down south a leader less shamesome, 
Who has defied the whole empire of Lamedom,
With a spine that won't bend,
Has promised he'll send
The whole crop right back where it came from!

But Hillary said Let's not be hasty!
Believing those morsels quite tasty,
Savouring each ballot,
She broadened her palate
To include terror's halaliest pasty.

So beware of what grows in your garden,
And toward crossovers let your heart harden, 
For if you're subject to bouts
Of indigestible sprouts,
You'll be sorry you never debarred 'em!

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